Each day I learn new things about myself. One thing I learned this Summer was I don’t sit still enough to ask myself what I learn each day, but I am starting to make more room for daily reflection. As I power down for the evening, I now ask myself, what did you learn today Shile? Somehow my mind had programmed itself to think this question was unnecessary if there was no big dramatic life event that would require a lesson.

However, I am retraining my mind to learn that if each new day is a blessing, then there is also a lesson. It doesn’t have to be big and dramatic and there is so much to learn in the small things. So, I have embraced pausing long enough to hear my heartbeat, to stop my mind from rushing with thoughts, and just sit, even if for a few minutes; those minutes are enough for me to reflect on my truth. What have I learned……..somedays things come to me easily and other days I sit for a while and wonder, but when I dig deeper I find there is always something there.

The practice of reflection helps me be more thankful, I occasionally have a pen and notebook and write down what I am grateful for, when I do this, am truly able to see how much I have been blessed. Other days, I feel some form of regret for one thing I didn’t do as well as I thought I should. Who am I kidding, most days when I started this, I was filled with a lot of regret about everything I wasn’t able to do and all the wrong steps I made in the day. It’s no surprise that this led to more anxiety about the next day; I wondered if I would fall short again and again. I then realized I was doing it all wrong, so I approached it differently. I decided to pray before these moments of reflection and invite the Holy Spirit into this solemn moment that I had kept only for myself.

It changed everything. When I say this, I don’t mean I didn’t have things I could have done better each day, but the Holy Spirit helped me have conviction and not condemnation. Not only did he convict me, but he spoke to me about how to be different. One of the beautiful things about God is He never condemns, He convicts, He corrects but condemnation and shame are never from Him. I had to unlearn the wrong patterns I built and started to embrace the new strategy which brought me freedom direction, clarity, and discipline. I stopped seeing the glass half empty by focusing on areas I feel short but, I also learned to see the glass half full and recognize areas I had a win each day. Oh, speaking of winning, I will write on this someday.

Today, I am reflecting on my reflections, and I can see how much it has changed me. If you are a person like me who is always on the go and doesn’t allow too much room to pause, I encourage you to do it. Start off with 5 minutes a day before bedtime and slowly incorporate another 5 minutes into the middle of your workday. Life is not meant to be lived in a hurry, moments of reflection are important so you can self-evaluate, and course-correct when you are going off track or just get a moment to breathe where you need it. Some of us don’t even leave enough room in our day for God to speak to us. Go ahead, and reflect, take it a day at a time and you will find this will help change the pace of your life.